August 12, 2016 by Soo Ee
Provokers are lurking. I have had my fair share of provokers, most recently posted on https://optimistcave.wordpress.com/2016/07/03/thank-you-all-for-your-support-and-love/
I have learnt to choose the meaningful battles I want to fight and not be drawn into stupid ones they want to engage me in. What’s in the excerpt worked for me. I would be more than happy to share my experiences so do drop me a note.
‘Disagreeable people provoke irritation in those they encounter, who then start to feel angry in return. In other words, in the open loop, the irritated amygdala draws the other into perturbations. But when the other does not return aggression in kind – in fact, remains firmly in a positive register- then the person with the arpused amygdala has a chance to calm down, or at least not become more provoked. Indeed, in one study, the irritable person reported afterward that he just couldn’t be confrontational because the other person kept responding with positivity.’
Excerpt from ‘Primal leadership’