He is a boss not a leader 

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August 6, 2016 by Soo Ee

Recently, I came to realise things at work were not the way I’d picture it to be – that my boss is an impartial leader who had trust in us, someone of great magnanimity and capability to lead us to great heights under his leadership. 

The harsh reality that he was petty. He let his pride get into many big pictures and clashes. He wanted to be the boss of us instead of a leader to us.  

I always thought that if your workplace is infected with negativity, it falls to the leader to reverse that trend and create a culture of positivity. The leader has to be the one to find the silver lining and not the one who keeps reminding the crew of the obstacles in our way. The ‘boss’ told us he was going to ‘jump ship’ if things don’t go well in this place now. I am puzzled by the type of messages he was sending out to us, telling us day in and day out the losing battle he has been fighting with the management, that he won’t be staying long in this department, and that he didn’t think to suppress anyone of us who wanted to surpass him. He always make it known he could step down and go some place else to shine and that he didn’t need to be here to take the crap. 

He wasn’t always clear about what he wanted. He went around the  members in be team, telling things like it was a secret and that he was sharing with sos and so exclusively. To me, that type of mind games says he was trying to sow discord among us. I say, “be clear what it is that you want, don’t beat about the bush and tell it to all of us. Spill the expectations that you expect us to do and then we will know what you expect of us. It pains my ears you keep on telling us you are not the boss, call us as a team but you dislike the fact that when we make decisions on our own and not involve you in the process.”

And it angers me he tried to sow discord among us and to gain sympathy points for his dance with the devil. My take, no one can force a cow to drink if the cow doesn’t want to. Go figure. 

Influence is power and he doesn’t understand that. He thinks control and us obeying and doing everything he says is power. Successful leaders know how much help it took them to get there, and they understand how interdependent we all are. Stop expecting us to report to you every single thing we do when you yourself don’t share truthfully the plans he has, with us. Going to individual members in the team and telling them bits of pieces of information exclusively isn’t sharing. It is creating an environment of mistrust and I despise that. He wants to be a leader, then he has to offer support and guidance to others around him and not dumping his hurt-pride emotions on us and making the team wonder how is it all going to end. 

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